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Venting. April 24, 2011

Filed under: Uncategorized — zissouisdutch @ 8:00 pm

I miss home so much. I hate to be whiny at all for this amazing experience but it’s just not what I anticipated. Everyday is a challenge, not a vacation. I think it’s just because like Anthony said, I’m doing the same things I would at home…school etc but without the same comforts that make it worth it. I thought I would be traveling to a different city every other weekend, but as I’ve come to find out, it’s expensive and the travel is incredibly time-consuming and stressful. Living with yourself is hard. No distractions of little things like who will be a the show tonight or what my work schedule is. It’s constant self-evaluation and reflection on how you feel about what’s going on around you. Honestly, I don’t want to examine anything I just want to have a good time and I’m having such a hard time doing that. I love the friends I’ve made but doing the same things every week don’t have the same draw as they would in my comfortable little bubble at home.

The point it, I need some advice on how to last two more lonely months. I’m generally an optimist. Well, that’s not true. I’m a realist. Maybe I should have just taken a 3 week vacation and city-hopped to all the places I wanted to go in the first place? Although, traveling as a single young female is incredible dangerous thus I’m very nervous about my trip to Paris at the beginning of June. Traveling by yourself period is hard, let alone in a foreign country with a different language. I CAN DO IT. BAH. I’m strong and smart and can handle this. RIGHT? RIGHT. OKAY, official change of attitude.

All the Europeans do some version of the cheek kissing greeting and that is not satisfactory. WHERE ARE THE DANG HUGS, PEOPLE?

Spring is beautiful here. I went for a bike ride on the ‘fietspad’ by the canals before the sun set and besides being whip-lashed in the face by a bee, the flowers looked divine and smelled even better. I love that they weren’t planted in arrangements, but just happened by nature and it was more than perfect. Pictures to come.


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